Somewhere over the rainbow…

Staying with In-Laws

When I was single, I have this dream of getting married to a lovely man who’ll prepare us a nice cosy house before we get hitched. Then our love story will be extended with the birth of our kids and we’ll be one happy family living happily ever after.

Well, that dream has yet to come. When hubby and I started dating, I know for sure that we won’t be staying by ourself after getting married. It’s not that his parents prefer the sons to stick to them, but it’s just happenned that my parents-in-laws’ place has sufficient rooms to accumulate all of us. Most of my friends are shocked that I’m staying with in-laws as they rather have their own houses as they refused to compromise and also afraid of handling relationships with in-laws.

I’m staying in an old house, so it’s quite spacious. Hubby and I know that it’s impossible for us to have such a spacious place to live in if we intended to buy one soon. We don’t want to be confined in paying lots of monthly housing loan and work ourself to death in earning that amount of BIG money! So, we decided to stay with his parents for a few years until our kids are much older.

There’re advantages in staying in a big extended family. Here’re some:
1. I don’t have to worry sick leaving my kids with a maid as my MIL is around most of the time.
2. My kids have their cousins to play with and they’re less lonely.
3. Justin learns how to share with his cousins at a very young age. But he still prefers to play with jie jie.
4. I have lots of second-handed-baby stuffs and save me a lot of money.
5. Got some good tips in bringing up babies from MIL, and it’s especially helpful for new mom like me.
6. Free yoga lesson, given by SIL!!!
7. I don’t have to freak myself out when hubby’s working outstation as there’re always people staying together under the same roof.
8. I don’t have to cook!
9. I become a better person as I’ve learnt to tolerate with other people’s needs, speak WISELY to avoid hurting others’ feelings, sharing our stuffs, and etc.
10. Justin and Isabelle can have a big compound to play in everyday!

However, there’re also some disadvantages:
1. I can’t bring up my kids the way I want them to be as SIL and MIL have different opinions sometimes. Ex: I don’t like kids to take junk food but MIL uses junkies as bribery.
2. Xin Yi and Li Wei are TV-addicts and I have to prevent Justin and Isabelle from being one.
3. The house is always noisy and messy. I mean really really MESSY! But I’ve learnt to ignore the stuffs lah…
4. Justin and Isabelle won’t be able to have their own rooms separately when they’re ready, so we still have to move out.
5. Besides taking care of my kids, I have to take care of Xin Yi and Li Wei too. I’ve been trained to be a mother even before being one myself. Errr, this doesn’t sound bad huh?
6. Justin likes to imitates his cousin’s bad habit like eating in front the TV (MIL prefers the kids to sit and glue to TV while she feeds, but I hate it)
7. It’s hard to change MIL and SIL’s ways of comparing and judging my kids. I prefer them to grow up in an environment where there’re not being criticized with negative comments, but MIL and SIL are not having the same mentality like me.
8. If there’re any misunderstanding, I have to keep myself calm and not creating a scene as that will only make hubby “nan zhou”, dunno should side me or his mum.
9. My mom doesn’t like to visit me until I’ve got my own place!

In short, I’ll still stick to staying with my in-laws. Hubby and I have plans to move out to our place one day, but not so soon…

Like Brother Like Sister

Justin’s been sucking his thumb to sleep since he’s 3 months old. I couldn’t do much about it as I was away for days that time, and he wasn’t nursed to sleep. So, he sucked to sleep to fulfil his suckling needs as I didn’t let him use a pacifier. This is one die-hard habit for him, and he still doesn’t feel like stopping it.

But for Isabelle, I was not away from her at all. However, she’s developed this sucking her fist to sleep since last week. She sucks so hard and there’s this “chop chop” sound whenever she sucks. Now she refuses to be nursed to sleep as she knows she’ll vomit if she’s overfed, and will rather has her fist wet!

Anyway, during my ultra-scan for both pregnancies, we saw the images for both babies sucking their thumbs / hands in my womb separately. It’s really fancinating to know that they actually started this habit before they’re out!

Justin is so happy to see his little sister joining in his gang. Now, no one can tell him to quit by saying “baby doens’t suck, so you don’t suck lah…etc”

Now, he enjoys sucking his thumb beside Isabelle and falls asleep together.

Where’s the Baby?

I was busy yesterday. Went to my centre in the morning and hubby’s office to help him out with some paper work in the afternoon. After that, I went to meet my friends who wanted to do some shopping. I wanted to buy some baby products so I decided to shop first before going home for my pumping session.

But I was quite engorged, and felt uncomfortable when I reached Ipoh Parade. Since I brought along my pump, I thought I might just pump in the nappy room at Parkson Grand. It’s a nice baby changing room with 2 separated rooms equiped with sofas and curtains. I like to use it when Justin was younger.

So as I was doing my pumping, I could hear some promoters chatting outside the room. It’s Wednesday, so it’s not crowded. That’s why the promoters could gathered for a chat.

After I’d done pumping, I walked out of the room feeling relieved and good! But I noticed that they’re gossipping behind my back and I could feel that they’re watching me. One of them even went into the nappy room and came out telling the rest of them there’s no baby inside.

” Mo baby keh?” (No baby); “Kui hong yap bim juo meh ye?” (What’s she doing inside?); bla bla bla…

I could hear what they said as I was just browsing some baby products nearby. They’re so ke po chi about what I was doing in the room. Thus I decided to break the mystery by telling them I pumped my milk in the room just now. Wow, if you could see their expressions, they looked so surprised!

I ignored them and kept myself busy at choosing the things for my kids. One of the promoters approached me by asking me if I’d like to buy milk bottles. I politely told her that my baby’s breastfed most of the time, so I didn’t need many bottles. Then, she started persuading me to buy a container for storing formula milk. Huh? She still didn’t get what I meant.

But never mind, I was too busy to explain anyway. Maybe not many mothers pump their milk there, but only nurse the babies in the rooms. I’m glad that they provide rooms which are confortable for nursing or pumping, and at least I don’t have to pump in the toilet while shopping!